And Time's Person of the Year is.........

Da da da!! It's Barack Hussein Obama!!! (Act surprised.)

Yes, our illustrious leader beat out the likes of
Malala Yousafzai (a troublemaker who tries to challenge male dominance), Tim Cook (a guy who got famous by inheriting someone else's work), Mohamed Morsi (the new Egyptian dictator), and Fabiola Gianotti (a scientist who may [or may not have; more tests need to be done until it's actually confirmed...but hey, I guess they needed another woman who wasn't an unruly troublemaker] discovered a particle...although to be fair she had a whole team, but it's person of the year not team of the year so screw you other guys) to take home this year's illustrious title of Time's Person of the Year!

And not a more well deserving person is there! I mean, he has single-handedly wiped out global terrorism, turned the extreme Muslims into peaceful, loving people, made it possible for all poor people to have phones not be poor anymore, eradicated racism, sexism, fascism, and every other -ism really, cured the human condition, and has united all countries, races, species, and ideologies to create one world; one love for all the rest of time. And with another four years to work with, I hear he's set his sights on reversing global warming, curing cancer (and the common cold), and bringing sabre-tooth tigers back from extinction. What fun that will be!?

But seriously, I stopped thinking Time's Person of the Year was anything special when Adolf Hitler won it in 1938.

I see not much has changed in the past 70 years. They clearly still have a monkey make their picks...but really, who doesn't love a monkey?